50 Ways To Annoy Vlad
by satrinity
Summary: Based off of a profile list that a lot of you have probably seen before. They are in random order, so that the plot makes sense. Better summary inside. T 'cause I don't trust my friends. :P


**Blanket Disclaimer and Summary**: I do not own Danny Phantom, or anything else that may be mentioned in this fic (coughmateriacough), save for a few exceptions. I own myself(Katie) and the other torturers who will be making suggestions to me as I write, and who may even show up for some of the stunts (ex: Erin). I also do not own the "50 Ways to Annoy Vlad" list. If someone could tell me who came up with that, I'd love to be able to give the person their credit. This fic is based off of that list, which I randomly saw on a few profiles. They will be done in random order, and unlike some fics that this is done in, my story will actually have a plot, which may not be evident until a bit later. This is pre-season 3.

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><p><strong>50 Ways to Annoy Vlad<strong>

a Danny Phantom fanfic by Satrinity

**Chapter 1**: Out of the Blue

**Location**: Wisconsin

There really was no warning to the start of the strange events that plagued my home. One day everything was about as normal as it could be. The mansion was quiet, I had not had any trouble from the ghosts that tended to try (and fail) to enter the real world through my ghost portal, and there had been neither hide nor hair of the boy who I was very quickly growing weary of reasoning with.

At first, he was the first person that my blame went to. Who else but young Daniel would pull such juvenile, albeit odd, acts? He was a fourteen year old, after all. Not only that, but he still held a grudge due to the numerous times that I had attempted to lure himself and his mother away from that oaf that he called a father. It quickly became evident, however, that this was not the case.

On the first morning, I awoke to what led me to believe that it was him in the first place. During the night, none of my alarms had been tripped, not even the ones that keyed into the ecto-signature of every ghost that I had encountered thus far, including Daniel. This did not stop a chill of premonition from working its way down my spine. I had the odd feeling of being watched, and it was making me more and more uncomfortable.

I mentally berated myself for such ludicrous thoughts, and climbed from my bed... only to stop dead in my tracks.

The door to my closet was ajar.

For most people, this would not have been a cause for alarm, but I had mechanisms at the base of my more frequently-used doors that pulled them closed after me. There should have been no way for that door to stay open, unless someone had purposefully blocked it.

I crept silently over to the open door, a pink ectoblast already glowing in my palm. I was prepared to switch to my ghost half if the need arose; being one of the world's richest men, I was very aware of the possibility of assassins breaking into my home. It was, in fact, a situation that I had encountered once or twice in the past, before my reputation in certain circles had led to them deeming me 'too dangerous to bother with'.

I stayed behind the door and jerked it open, trying to surprise my assailant. My keen hearing caught not even an intake of air. There was complete silence on the interior of my closet.

I turned myself invisible and intangible and cautiously peeked around the corner. I raised an eyebrow and let myself fade back into the visible spectrum as the sight within greeted me. I flicked on a light so as to confirm what I was seeing.

In the middle of my walk-in closet stood a life-size, cardboard cutout of Danny Phantom striking a heroic pose.

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><p>I smiled as Vlad Masters' expression faded from one of chagrin at being pulled for such a loop, to anger, and finally to a reluctant grin as he turned to scan the area around him.<p>

"Very funny, Daniel. I don't know how you managed to get past my security measures, and I applaud you, but isn't this a bit juvenile, even for you?" His words were met with silence. He frowned at the lack of a response. "... Daniel?"

I chuckled and turned to the girl behind me. "Good job, E. He still has no idea."

She smiled and started to take a number of small, greenish orbs out of a compartment at the bottom of a glove that she wore on her right hand. "I still can't believe that you got materia in the first place, Katie, let alone materia that simulates ghost powers!"

I shrugged and turned back to the odd collection of mismatched monitors and CPU's that were assembled on a desk in the study that I was operating from. "If you know enough enchanters, Erin, you can make materia do almost anything. As to how I got it... well, that's my own little secret," I finished with a smirk.

She rolled her eyes. "Since when are you an evil mastermind, though?"

"Since I found the list," I answered. "And it's not evil if I'm making the bad guy miserable. It's justice."

"Great. So when do I get to do the next one?" Erin was practically bouncing with excitement.

I laughed. "Soon, E. Soon."

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><p>3.) Hide cardboard cutouts of Danny in his closet.<p>

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><p><strong>Read and review! Flames are welcome.<strong>

If you are the real owner of the list and you don't want me using your stuff, PM me and I'll take it down.

I don't know if this specific thing has been done before, but I've got big ideas for it, and it should come out being fairly original. It'll also have a lot of pranks that are not on the list, supplied by my boyfriend, TD Inc.

Remember, review! I love criticism in any form, and I'm looking to better myself as a writer. Help me out here!

PS: Sorry that it's so short. There was no way to lengthen this without going off topic.


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